Christian Living

“Unanswered Prayers” : Why God Says No

If you have been a Christian for any amount of time, you must have experienced the hardship of “unanswered prayers” (God always answers prayers, I use the term unanswered in this article to refer to denied requests). It’s a reality we must accept because God doesn’t always give us what we ask. But it usually happens when we don’t pray as we ought to.

God has given us specific guidelines and conditions for effective prayers. And if we follow them, He has promised us not only to hear our prayers but also to provide us with what we ask.

Jesus said in John 14:13-14, “Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask me anything in my name, I will do it.” And I believe Him.

I believe God wants to grant all our prayer requests. And when He doesn’t give us “whatever we ask,” we need to ask ourselves why. Thankfully, the Bible answers that question, and here are six reasons that hinder our prayers.

1. We don’t ask in faith

But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord.

James 1:6-7

A common reason why God doesn’t answer our prayers is lack of faith. Matthew 21:22 says, “And whatever you ask in prayer, you will receive if you have faith.” But whether it is because He hasn’t responded to previous requests or we doubt His goodness, we often pray without really believing God will do what we ask.

This is not how God wants us to pray. When we petition God, we must have confidence that He is a good Father who delights in giving good gifts to His children (Matthew 7:11). We should trust in God’s character, motives, and believe He hears and answers our prayers. Anything less dishonors Him.

Moreover, lack of faith hinders our prayers because without faith it is impossible to please God (Hebrews 11:6), and 1 John 3:22 teaches us that God answers our prayers when we do what pleases Him.

2. We ask for selfish reasons

You ask and do not receive, because you ask wrongly, to spend it on your passions.

James 4:3

Our motives and intentions are important factors in prayer because God looks at our hearts. 1 Samuel 16:6 says, “a man sees the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” And Proverbs 21:2 says, “every way of a man is right in his own eyes, but the Lord weighs the heart.”

So even if we pray for grand and noble things, if we ask them for the wrong reasons, God will reject them. And the prime motive behind unanswered prayers is selfishness.

We must not pray to satisfy our passions and desires without consideration of God’s will. The Bible commands us to everything for the glory of God (1 Corinthians 10:32), and to do nothing out of self-ambition or conceit but to look out for the interests of others (Philippians 2:3-4). Hence, when we pray, we must have the glory of God and the well being of others as the end goal. Not the gratification of our flesh, or self-centered pleasures.

3. We don’t pray according to God’s will

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.

1 John 5:14-15

God will not answer prayers that violate His will. Therefore, it is critical we know God’s will, which He revealed in Scriptures, and we pray accordingly.

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For instance, He doesn’t want us to pray for people who commit sins He won’t forgive (1 John 5:16), He wants us to abstain from sexual immorality ((1 Thessalonians 4:3), do good to others (1 Peter 2:15), and much more (1 Thessalonians 5:12-24).

And if we are unclear about His will regarding certain situations about our life and need the wisdom to make a decision that will honor Him, we can freely ask, and He will give it to us. (James 1:5)

4. We do not pray persistently

And he told them a parable to the effect that they ought always to pray and not lose heart.

Luke 18:1

Unanswered prayers also happen because we give up or don’t pray persistently. After Jesus taught his disciples how to pray, He also instructed them to pray without giving up. He illustrated it with two parables: The parable of a friend who comes at midnight in Luke 11: 5-8, and the parable of the persistent widow in Luke 18:1-8.

Both parables had the same lesson: when we keep praying and petitioning God incessantly (1 Thessalonians 5:17), He will answer us.

God doesn’t want us to pray once or twice and be done with it. On the contrary, He wants us to persevere in prayer until things start changing. He won’t get tired of hearing us, so let’s not get tired of asking Him.

5. We harbor unforgiveness in our hearts

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.

Mark 11:24-25

Forgiveness matters to God, and He expects us to forgive others as He has forgiven us. Jesus illustrated the importance of forgiveness with the parable of the unforgiving servant in Matthew 18:23-24.

In this parable, a servant owed his master a massive debt that he could not pay. The master out of pity forgave him the debt. But when that servant encountered a fellow servant who owed him a considerably smaller debt, he refused to forgive him. The master heard about it and became angry at the servant’s hard heart. Consequently, He threw the servant in jail until he should pay all his debt.

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Can you imagine God doing us any favors if we act like that unforgiving servant? Our prayers will most likely go unanswered.

Moreover, we must not only forgive others, but we must seek to address grievances they may have towards us. God will not even accept our worship if we are not reconciled with others (Matthew 5:23-24).

6. We are living in sin

For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”

1 Peter 3:12

The presence of unconfessed sin is another major stumbling block in our prayer life. As God is holy, our sin separates us from Him and renders our prayers highly ineffective.

John 9:31 says, “God does not listen to sinners, but if anyone is a worshiper of God and does his will, God listens to him.” And Isaiah 59:2 says, “but your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, and your sins have hidden his face from you so that he does not hear.

This implies two things. First, if we do not believe in Christ, and we are still dead in our sins, God won’t hear or answer our prayers. Jesus said only those who abide in Him would receive what they ask for in prayer (John 15:7).

Secondly, if we are believers and we have unconfessed sin in our hearts, our prayers might be unanswered until we confess them and repent. Psalm 66:18 says, “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.

The good news is that He promises to forgive all those who repent and earnestly seek His forgiveness (1 John 1:9).

Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive that your joy may be full.

John 16:24

We must remember that God is not a vending machine, and He will not automatically give us whatever we ask if we check the right boxes. He will be merciful and compassionate to whom He wants (Romans 9:15). So, while eliminating the above hindrances will significantly increase the likelihood of our prayers getting answered favorably, it won’t guarantee it.

God’s ways are higher than ours, and He may consider many other things before answering our praying. However, even if He says no, He is still good, holy, and has our eternal well-being in mind. Besides, God’s blessings sometimes come disguised as unanswered prayers.

  Grace and peace to you!
 A man with his head in his hands, unanswered prayers
A man kneeling on leaves praying, unanswered prayers
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Gordon
Gordon
1 year ago

#1 is a demand to delude yourself into thinking that God IS a cosmic vending machine. You have to act like he’ll say yes, despite the number of times previously he says nothing. This is the definition of insanity. #2 “So even if we pray for grand and noble things, if we ask them for the wrong reasons, God will reject them” means that God is willing to kill someone by refusing to heal them, simply because you love that person and are praying for them and because you have yourself the pleasure of having them around, perhaps implying also… Read more »

Gordon
Gordon
1 year ago
Reply to  Audrey

#1 Why does the rain dance work? Because they keep dancing until it rains. Is the rain dance a prayer to God, or is praying to God another rain dance? #5 Making a shock of emotions IS half of my point as well as the question I can’t seem to get a straight answer to, why God has children raped by giving strength to evil men, and by respecting the free will of the rapist over the free will of the victim. The fact that you can name some names to draw attention away from a problem tells me how… Read more »

Sydney
4 years ago

Thank you for sharing these six points! I appreciate how you’ve pulled them into one place, to really search ourselves on these important reminders to consider in our prayer life.

Leslie
4 years ago

I agree with all of these. I think sometimes I do pray for the “right” thing but with a selfish attitude. We had a pastor preach once on Luke 11:8 and the word “importunity.” It carries that idea of persistently praying with shamelessness, constantly begging the Lord. I am thankful we serve an omniscient God who wants what is best for our lives. 💕

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Welcome to my blog! My name is Audrey, I am a sojourner and slave of Christ.

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