How to Love One Another

Jesus commanded us to love one another as He loves us. He said in John 13:34 “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.”

This commandment appears in several other places in the New Testament such as in John 13:34, John 15:12, John 15:17, Romans 13:8, 1 Thessalonians 3:12, 2 Thessalonians 1:3, 1 Peter 1:22 , 1 John 3:11, 1 John 3:23, 1 John 4:7, 1 John 4:11-12, and 2 John 5.

Loving others is obviously a big deal; it’s one of the greatest commandments, and it’s at the core of Christianity. But how do we do it?

I previously did a word study on love and learned that biblical love is mostly action. The question now is, what actions demonstrate love for one another?

Thankfully God didn’t make it a mystery or guesswork. On the contrary, He left us a detailed guide with practical ways we can love one another as He loves us. Here are a few things you can do to love others, and also how Jesus did these things for us.

*All Scriptures are taken from the English Standard Version unless noted otherwise.*

1. Love others by encouraging them

 “Love is patient, love is kind…

You love others by encouraging them. When you encourage someone, you give them courage, support, and hope. You help them go through their trials and keep moving forward. A word of encouragement can make such a vast difference in others’ lives, and we have an unlimited supply of it.

Jesus exemplified it many times with His disciples, as illustrated in John 14:1, John 14:27, John 16:33. He still encourages and comforts us today, and He wants us to comfort others as well (2 Corinthians 1:3-5).

“Therefore encourage one another with these words. ” – 1 Thessalonians 4:18

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:11

“But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.” – Hebrews 3:13

“And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another” – Hebrews 10:2 4-25

2. Pray for one another 

“…it does not envy…”

Show love by praying for others, friends, and enemies alike. When you lift others before God, it shows you think about them, cares about their needs, and want the best for them.

When Jesus walked the earth, He regularly prayed for others. He prayed for His disciples and all believers in John 17. And He also prayed for His enemies, even the ones who crucified Him (Luke 23:34).

“Therefore, confess your sins to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working.” – James 5:16

3. Act humbly towards others 

“…it does not boast, it is not proud…”

Loving others means putting them above yourself. C.S Lewis said, “humility is not thinking less of you, but thinking of you less.” You can act humbly towards others by listening to them, not blaming them for your mistakes, accepting their critique or reproach, receiving their help, considering them, showing interest in them, and not thinking or acting like you are better or more important than them.

Jesus humbled Himself to become human and die on the cross (Philippians 2:8), He was humble towards His earthly parents and obeyed them (Luke 2:51). He never exalted Himself, He listened to others’ concern, and always thought of them more.  

“submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” – Ephesians 5:21

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.” – Philippians 2:3

“…Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” – 1 Peter 5:5

4. Be hospitable to everyone 

“…it does not dishonor others…”

You love like Christ when you don’t discriminate but accept everyone regardless of their background. Welcome others that may have a different race, political views, etc. and treat them with kindness and respect.

Jesus welcomed everyone! He played with children, valued women, interacted with Samaritans, had dinner with tax collectors, touched lepers, etc. He still welcomes anyone who will come to Him today, regardless of their background and shower them with His love.

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.” – Romans 12:10

“Therefore welcome one another as Christ has welcomed you, for the glory of God.” – Romans 15:7

“Show hospitality to one another without grumbling.” – 1 Peter 4:9

5. Serve others with love

“…it is not self-seeking…”

To love others is to serve them. You love others when you do things for them without expecting anything in return, things you may not like to do, and that will cost or inconvenience you. There is no love without service.

Jesus said He came to serve others (Mark 10:45). He fulfilled it throughout His life by the numerous miracles He performed, ministering to the sick, allowing Himself to be interrupted to help others, etc. He showed His most significant act of love and service on the cross when He died for us.

“If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet.” – John 13:14

“For you were called to freedom, brothers. Only do not use your freedom as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.”– Galatians 5:13

“As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace”  – 1 Peter 4:10

6. Live at peace with one another 

“…it is not easily angered…”

We love one another by living at peace with them. You can live at peace with others by not saying hateful comments or speeches towards them, not looking for their trouble, provoking them, etc. And when offense arises, seek to make peace by either apologizing or forgiving.

Jesus lived at peace with everyone. He didn’t provoke others, nor did He let himself get provoked. He didn’t look for fights or quarrels, and when the Pharisees tested Him, He always answered with love.

“Live in harmony with one another. Do not be haughty, but associate with the lowly. Never be wise in your own sight.” – Romans 12:16

“May the God of endurance and encouragement grant you to live in such harmony with one another, in accord with Christ Jesus.” -Romans 15:5

“Salt is good, but if the salt has lost its saltiness, how will you make it salty again? Have salt in yourselves, and be at peace with one another.” – Mark 9:50

“Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another.” -Galatians 5:26

“with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love.” – Ephesians 4:2

7. Show love with forgiveness

“…it keeps no record of wrongs…”

When we genuinely love others, we forgive them. We let go of their offenses and choose not to hold it against them. If you harbor unforgiveness towards someone, you decide to be right rather than be reconciled; you choose the situation instead of the relationship, and that’s not loving. Forgiveness is an expression of love; there cannot be love without forgiveness.

Jesus always forgave others, no matter what they did. He forgave those who loved Him as well as those who didn’t. One of the last things He did before dying was forgiving the very ones that crucified Him. He still offers forgiveness to all who asks today.

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” – Ephesians 4:32

“bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.” – Colossians 3:13

” See that no one repays anyone evil for evil, but always seek to do good to one another and to everyone.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:15

8. Don’t badmouth others

“…Love does not rejoice in evil..”

Complaining, speaking ill of others, insulting them, and gossiping does not show love for others. On the contrary, they may lead to fights, quarrels, and hate. You can love others by always speaking well of them, and by seasoning your speech about them with love and grace.

Jesus never gossiped or behaved rudely towards others. He never complained about the ones who treated Him unjustly, nor did He insult them. He didn’t speak ill of His disciples when they abandoned Him and even denied Him.  

“Jesus answered them, “Do not grumble among yourselves.” – John 6:43

“Do not speak evil against one another, brothers. The one who speaks against a brother or judges his brother, speaks evil against the law and judges the law…” – James 4:11

“Do not grumble against one another, brothers, so that you may not be judged; behold, the Judge is standing at the door.” – James 5:9

9. Speak truth to others in love

“…but rejoices with the truth…”

Telling painful truths to one another is an act of love. When others are in error or sin, don’t let them persist in it for fear of offending them. Instead, show love by correcting them gently and privately, with kindness and grace. Build them up with the truth, don’t tear them down with lies or omission.

Jesus never lied and never shied away from telling painful truths. He called out the Pharisees on their hypocrisy (Matthew 23:1-39) and rebuked His disciples when they misbehaved (Matthew 16:23). Many people even abandoned Him because of His hard sayings (John 6:66). Nevertheless, Jesus always tells the truth because it sets us free and because He loves us.

“Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.” – Ephesians 4:15

“Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another.” – Ephesians 4:25

“Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old self with its practices” – Colossians 3:9

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God.” – Colossians 3:16

10. Bear other’s burden

…It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres…”

You can show love to others by taking on what is weighing them down. Doing this reduces the load they have to bear and helps them through their trials. You can do that by being there for them like Job’s friends, listening, offer a shoulder to cry on, etc.

Jesus bore the burdens of others and still does it today. He bore the heavy weight of our sin and took on our punishment (Isaiah 53:6). He bears our troubles and worries and gives us peace and rest (Matthew 11:28-30).

“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” – Galatians 6:2

In conclusion

“…Love never fails.” – 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (NIV)

Whew! Loving like Jesus is not easy, but glory be to God, we don’t have to do it with our strength alone! Jesus sent us the Holy Spirit, and by His power, we can truly love others like that.

This guide is by no means exhaustive but is an excellent place to start if you want to learn how to love one another like Jesus.

   Grace and peace to you!